I’m getting older. At least my body is but my mind and attitude had a huge head start. So. I think I’ll talk about just a few things I am no longer willing to tolerate. The first is peopling, people are highly overrated. Everyone thinks themselves to be even more interesting than the Most Interesting Man in the World, from the Dos Equis, beer commercials, you remember the ones always ending with him saying, “Stay Thirsty My Friends.” You have to stay thirsty, correction: DRUNK, just to get through conversations with some of the chowderheads I’ve encountered through life. I’m not even sure I like people much, but I do like Netflix, cheeseburgers, beer and quiet.
Next thing I find myself now disliking is driving at night. I mean being out after dark, let alone driving in it, is something I don’t want to do anymore. Somewhere along the way, the nights got darker and the headlights from oncoming vehicles, burned our fucking retinas out. My night vision has assumed mole status, and know what? I’m fine with that.
Next thing I no longer have any interest in is the ages old pointless exercise of arguing with idiots. I used to engage, not anymore, my give a flying fuck meter is broken beyond repair. William Gibbs McAdoo said, “It’s impossible to win an argument with an ignorant man.” Sums it up although my favorite is Mark Twain, “never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience. Every episode of The View is proof of that. Arguing with idiots is both a marathon and an Olympic sport, neither of which I am any longer conditioned for. I’m too old for that shit.
But the most important and my favorite thing about getting older is, NOT GIVING THE FIRST FUCK WHAT PEOPLE THINK ABOUT ME. I put that in all caps because I don’t want anyone to mistake what I am saying. Life is too short to give a damn about other people’s opinions. As long as I’m happy and not hurting anyone, Fuck ’em.
Until next time, be good or be good at it.
A Fifth of Brian 