Its officially September and you know what that means. That’s right, FOOTBALL SEASON IS HERE! Time to dust off those jerseys and paint your face your teams colors (if you’re that extreme) and cheer until your throats are sore guys.
Why?
Because football season is also unofficially called “Ignore your woman for the next 4 months season.”
She wants you to mow the lawn.
“I will AFTER the game.”
But by then it’s too dark.
She wants you to go shopping.
“Can’t. The games about to come on.”
And the most dreaded of all.
“Cuddles!” 😖
The word that frightens all men to their core. But not to worry. The game is on so you can just ignore her. Secret is to not even grunt in acknowledgement. Eventually she’ll get the message and leave you alone. Helpful tip, there’s strength in numbers so invite a lot of friends over on game day. The more the merrier.
Enjoy the next 4 months guys, give your brains a rest, you’ve earned it but it passes quickly and soon you’ll back to having think of clever excuses to say one step ahead of her. Use the time productively to think of some. No use waiting until the last minute.
Until next time, try and enjoy the daylight. 😎🚬
A Fifth of Brian 
Well, it’s a good thing that *Cuddles* can be done any time of day! They’re best at night ❤️🥰 Enjoy your 4 hours of football because once the game is over, it’s TIME!!! 😘😘😘
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The Farting Cuddler. Could you have possibly made that sound any less sexy?
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