A Foul Mouthed Breakfast Cereal

My day started off bad. I had an argument with my breakfast cereal.

Cheerios?

No.

Corn Flakes?

No and I hated those from the time I was a child.

Then what?

I’m getting there, hold your horses.

I’m talking about Rice Krispies.

That’s right. The smart mouth of all the breakfasts cereals. I found that out this morning.

I poured it in a bowl.

Added milk.

And heard, “Snap, Crackle, Fuck you.”

“What?” I said, not believing I had heard it right.

Same thing.

“Snap, Crackle, Fuck You!”

“You can’t speak that way to me,” I said.

Man was I wrong. Snap, Crackle amd a big “FUCK YOU.”

Snap and Crackle were doing their jobs but Pop had become a disgruntled employee.

“I don’t have to take this!” I yelled, face directly over the bowl.

Snap and Crackle continued to act in a professional cereal like manner but Pop, who had may been listening to too much gangsta rap may or have

been looking for a career change after all these years said for a chorus…

“Fuck You!”

“That’s it!” I shouted and threw the bowl and the potty mouthed cereal into the trash. I could have dumped the cereal and kept the bowl put I didn’t want to have anything that would allow such filthy language in my home. Yes, I know it’s an inanimate object, that’s not the point. From now on I’m sticking with Cheerios, they’re nicer.

Until next time, try and enjoy the daylight. 😎🚬